That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i came on her dog
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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