I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
