have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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