some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
