I don't think brook has ever known best
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
