Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
