i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
