So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Randomize
