Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm bleeding and have questions
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
