My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
