You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize