the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
