I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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