covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize
