There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Sober January is a disaster.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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