turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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