my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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