Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
organizing the empties. That sober.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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