I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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