just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize
