So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
