which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
