wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
