Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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