They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
