That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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