Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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