I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
