is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
