seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
