awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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