I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
