I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Randomize
