she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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