its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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