i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
