If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
