the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
we're making bets on your personal life
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
