I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize