going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
