I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
