drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
