Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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