I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
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