her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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