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• (407): View more from Florida

  So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.

  (352): View more from Florida

  WHAT?!

  (407): View more from Florida

  He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.

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• (562): View more from California

  Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.

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• (940): View more from Texas

  Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds

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• (727): View more from Florida

  If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!

  (404): View more from Georgia

  The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.

  (1-815): View more from Illinois

  Me too.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  only i would get off to receiving death threats online

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.

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