We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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