so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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