i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
