it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
